Sorry Stoke smashed! Newcastle 3-0 Stoke

Cabaye at the double
Newcastle continued applying pressure in the race for the Champions League with a well deserved victory over Stoke City this afternoon.

Yohan Cabaye and Papiss Cisse gave Newcastle and early foothold in a game the hosts never really looked like losing, before Cabaye scored his second of the game to seal all three points for the home side.

Barring Steven Taylor, Newcastle named what is effectively their strongest team with the only change from the 2-0 victory over Bolton being Cheik Tiote returning to the starting line up. Meanwhile Stoke made three changes from the side that drew 1-1 at Aston Villa with Dean Whitehead, Rory Delap and Kenwyne Jones being replaced by Andy Wilkinson, Glenn Whelan and Peter Crouch.

Newcastle started off brightly without really threatening and you got the sense that the longer the away side could stay level the more they fancied their chances. That theory proved short lived though when Hatem Ben Arfa received the ball on the left wing 14 minutes in and jinked his way past Ryan Shotton before sending over an inch perfect cross for Papiss Cisse who saw his looping header rebound off the crossbar into the path of Yohan Cabaye who headed the rebound powerfully past Asmir Begovic.

Just four minutes later it was 2-0, and two players who conspired to score the opener again combined to put some distance between the two sides, with Yohan Cabaye threading an excellent pass through the Stoke defence for Papiss Cisse who calmly slotted the ball into the corner of the Leazes End net.

Newcastle were playing some excellent stuff and really had Stoke chasing shadows at time, which was perhaps highlighted best when Hatem Ben Arfa bamboozled Wilson Palacios leaving the Honduran with no other option than to pull the enigmatic Frenchman down and earn a yellow card for his troubles.

It could have been 3-0 ten minutes before half-time after Yohan Cabaye threaded yet another ball through the heart of the Stoke defence, this time for Demba Ba who was just pipped to the ball by Ryan Shawcross. Davide Santon also went close after being played in, again by Cabaye, and advancing on the Stoke goal only to shoot tamely at goal.

The second half started off in much the same way as the first, with the home side on the front foot and controlling things. Indeed Demba Ba could have put the hosts out of sight within a minute of the restart had he not looked to take an extra touch in front of goal following a fine Hatem Ben Arfa cross.

Papiss Cisse had the ball in the back of the net following a fine effort from Demba Ba although the smiles were short-lived as the linesman adjudged Cisse to be offside when the ball was struck. TV replays disagree however and show that the Senegal hitman was level at worst. Never mind though as a third legitimate goal soon followed from Yohan Cabaye who curled the ball expertly into the far corner from 25 yards out.

It was exhibition stuff from Newcastle who dominated a poor Stoke outfit. It could have been 4-0 although Fabricio Coloccini managed to waste a free header just six yards from goal, all brought about by a corner earned by Demba Ba who had his shot deflected wide.

With the game won and Stoke not presenting any real threat, Newcastle took their foot off the pedal for the last 20 minutes or so. However they were still easily the better of the two teams and cruised to a comfortable win in a game they never looked like losing from the word go. It didn’t stop them trying to extend the lead either, with Asmir Begovic being forced into two fine saves from long rage Cheik Tiote shots.

In summary, another win for Newcastle, another clean sheet, another goal for Papiss Cisse, and another indication that the Magpies are fighting to the last. As things stand we sit in the final Champions League place, and anything other than a win for Tottenham at Loftus Road this evening will ensure that is where we’ll end the weekend.

Howay the lads!

Newcastle: Tim, Krul, Danny Simpson, Mike Williamson, Fabricio Coloccini, Davide Santon, Yohan Cabaye, Cheik Tiote, Jonas Gutierrez, Hatem Ben Arfa, Papiss Cisse, Demba Ba

Subs: Rob Elliot, Shane Ferguson, James Perch, Dan Gosling, Ryan Taylor, Leon Best, Shola Ameobi

Stoke: Asmir Begovic, Andy Wilkinson, Robert Huth, Ryan Shawcross, Marc Wilson, Ryan Shotton, Wilson Palacios, Glenn Whelan, Matthew Etherington, Peter Crouch, Jonathan Walters

Subs: Thomas Sorenson, Matthew Upson, Dean Whitehead, Jermaine Penant, Cameron Jerome, Kenwyne Jones, Ricardo Fuller

NUFC Blog Man of the Match: Yohan Cabaye – Two goals and one assist from the former Lille Captain who put in a performance of the highest calibre.

Attendance: 52,162

About toonsy

A lifelong Newcastle fan and current webmaster of this very 'blog who has the sole aim of creating a place by Newcastle United fans, for Newcastle United fans.

172 thoughts on “Sorry Stoke smashed! Newcastle 3-0 Stoke

  1. Toonsy that Spurs report was brilliant – what a hoot. It’s all nasty Capello’s fault 😆

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  2. TOONSY , TOONITIS has just put an idea in me heed , is their any way of next season bringing everyone on here next season together too meet up and have a NUFCBlog meet up and **** up. If we could all just pick a time and day and place too all come together and put faces to the comments . Their is a couple of us that could come from Holland .

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  3. i may be a few hours late posting that breaking news but it is 5 in the morning here so i hope i can be forgiven

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  4. Rather than watching Spurs, I’ve decided to take up knitting. It’s less stressful and even as an outright beginner there’s less chance of things unravelling.

    😆 I feel bad for them in a way given how many times we’ve been there with the toon

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  5. Dub – Should have been Monday just gone but asked for a weeks holiday for the baby and to get the Mrs settled, but as soon as it went to a c-section I knew it would need more time so asked for another week. First trip over the water is next Sunday

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  6. Axel – You could get the Megabus from Amsterdam 😉

    Yeah could do. I’d be up for that providing I had enough notice etc etc

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  7. What a game life is good in the leazes end,I find it hard to put my emotions in to words and i am struggling to think of what to say, oh yes now i remember.

    Estamos entre los cuatro primeros, estamos entre los cuatro primeros, José Enrique, estamos entre los cuatro primeros.

    for those non spanish speakers amongst us ,
    we’re in the top four,we’re in the top four,,Jose Enrique, we’re in the top four.

    Congrats on the birth of the bairn hope all are well,Toonsy,Newcastle will never be able to produce the joy you felt when you first saw your little one

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  8. Or a fork toonsy, some serious spam there 😉 glad to hear they’ve been helpful with it, all the best. At least you won’t have so many sleepless nights 😉

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  9. Dubtoon you will laugh your head off – I did last week reading them and that was before they imploded in the cup

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  10. Wigambi the biggest game of our season. Spurs have a home game that they will win, or should win and if they see we’ve won again they’ll be utterly deflated as thy have a couple of dodgy away games after that and their away form is *****!

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  11. Toonsy we always get the boat from ijmuiden to shields its always full with football fans wanting to see the Toon .

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  12. Lots of happy Spuds fans on triffictottenham blog.

    Redknapp out

    Bale up his own a***

    We are going to have a squad like Sunderlands’ 😆

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  13. Just seen Cabaye’s second goal. brilliant man…so quick to make the decision to shoot !

    Howay the lads !!!

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  14. Ice – Less than that init? Think Everton have to win to deny us? Don’t think even a draw is enough for them is it?

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  15. It’s been such a long time toon fans have been able to hold their heads this high but what a great feeling again!!

    I have to say, as successful as we were in the first half of the season, I think we won alot of our games ‘ugly’ if that makes sense.
    But now, some of our football is sensational. Ben Arfa and Cabaye are different class and teams would be grateful to have 1 player who can open defences with such quality. Hats off to Pardew for getting it right, because Cisse and Ba can score sack fuels of goals in this team.
    Defensively solid aswell with Tiote and Jonas giving plenty of cover from midfield.

    Another clean sheet for Krul and would love to see him get the golden glove this season.

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  16. Ice @36 Is that right ,I hadn’t read that he said that. ****** 👿

    Ice@56 😆 He is seriously and worryingly deluded. That friggin cap has damaged his brain. Where the hell is he getting his stats from ,we killed em without touching top gear the **** . 👿

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  17. KIMTOON heres his quote 😯

    He said: “Jon Walters really could have scored a hat-trick by himself. The main difference was they got in good scoring opportunities and hit the target; we got in good scoring opportunities and we didn’t hit the target.

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  18. I see in the BBC match report Pulis also says all our goals were ‘very poor’. WTF??!!

    To give Stoke some credit, they didn’t play as dirty as I thought they would or try to mash our players up much.

    Great job by all the lads today and such a pleasure to watch! Everyone else dropping points, fairytale stuff! 😯

    Also mackems haven’t scored in 4 games 😆

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  19. I noticed that susan, coinciding with our clean sheets. Its as if we really are playing them every week 😉

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  20. TOONITIS the year 1981 i discovered that my ***** was used more than just too **** through , god times have changed. 😳

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  21. ICE@106- I know my link kept freezing but got to say those walters chances defo passed me by so I shall have to pay even more attention to MOTD tonight now 😉 . A stat came up at one point to say attempts toon 16 stoke 6 I think and that was well befor the end of the match.

    Susan@108- 😆 Bless him ,got to justify his hoofball tactics somehow . 🙄 😉

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  22. @axel another old c@nt waiting for us to win something before we die 😆 ,wish i had not made my son support us 😳

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  23. I see the general opinion on Tottenham forums is they hope we get the CL spot over Chelsea because we “are eternal bottlers at the great moments like Tottenham and Chelsea are racist morons”.

    I see we are gaining some of that neutral support we had 15 years ago.

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  24. Toonitis…..to be fair, Beardsley ended up in goal in the 8-1 game 😉

    What a cracking day hic! :mrgreen:

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  25. Seriously can’t get over the fact that 4th place is now pretty much in our own hands 🙂

    That and a son in the same week 😯

    I think im overstimulated. I feel giddy 😆

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  26. axel if we finish in top five and you come here i will buy you more beer than youve ever thought of

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  27. To be fair you’d be surprised if Spurs supported anyone in London over us anyway wouldn’t you. I do kind of like them though…and not just because they’re sliding down the league. Its probably mainly the failures.

    Relatable 😥

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  28. Toonsy-I’m shocked by the praise and manner in which they’re speaking about us, as well as by their admirable attempts at grammar 😆

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  29. someone should poke that ****** Pulis with a stick (of dynamite) we totally outplayed them in every area of the park and he says they were unlucky to come away with nothing nothing flattered stoke

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  30. I wonder where we are in the pecking order on motd 😕

    Whey Barca will be wanting to thrash Chelski now they’re as good as out the title race :mrgreen:

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  31. if you cannot watch the toon live watch them on italian sky the lasses who do the links are out of this world and we get jeff stelling

    if you are unable to atcif yo

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  32. Toonsy – that’s sleep deprevation mate, you get used to it 😯 😆 😆

    We must have been good today – first on MOTD 😛

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  33. lol, James Perch’s first action after being brought on as a sub is a goal line block.

    What a legend.

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  34. Just watched us on match of the day. *** Cabayes second goal was sublime as was his pass to Cisse . I missed Cabs 2nd goal on the link as it froze .
    Ice – re Pulis comments from earlier . I only saw one Walters chance at the start ,Pretty sure if he could of had a hat trick they would of shown the three shots on goal that we cleared/saved . 😉

    Newkie@120- Yeh I can see a lot of us in them ,very alike ,lots of false dawns and the like to suffer . Hope they finish behind us in 5th and condem Chelski to 6th :mrgreen:

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  35. Notice that Neil Taylor had a decent game for Swansea today…wonder if he regrets not coming to the Toon now? 😆

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  36. **** I was at work so missed the match and then waited and waited through all the **** Saturday night TV for MOTD then fell asleep and woke half an hour into the program to find they’d already shown our match! Balls.

    We gonna get the highlights up on here?

    😐

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  37. Tony ‘scatman’ Pulis

    …HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

    …tawk that sheet bro 😎

    RAAAAARRRSCO. P. COLTRAIIINE :mrgreen:

    …he don’t take no disrepect , he ain’t gona tell you no more……

    ( 😯 )

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  38. If anyone likes to read the thoughts of Spurs fans atm… go to DearMrLevy.com – they really believe they aren’t getting 4th!

    ‘Part of me would love to see Harry sacked tomorrow, he deserves it, but we may as well hang on for another four games and hope that he goes to England so we can at least get some compensation. CL is now gone and we will most likely finish 6th, I can see us maybe winning one and losing three of our final games. This has been the most depressing season I can remember, so much hope and expectation now flushed down the pan, I hope Harry is feeling as bad as the fans but I doubt it.’

    CLASS! 😎

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  39. Well, I seen the fires burnin’
    And the local people turnin’
    On the merchants and the shops
    Who used to sell their brooms and mops
    And every other household item
    Watched the mob just turn and bite ’em
    And they say it served ’em right
    Because a few of them are white,
    And it’s the same across the nation
    Black & white discrimination
    They’re yellin’ “You can’t understand me!”
    And all the other **** they hand me
    In the papers and TV
    ‘N all that mass stupidity
    That seems to grow more every day
    Each time you hear some nitwit say
    He wants to go and do you in
    Because the color of your skin
    Just don’t appeal to him
    (No matter if it’s black or white)
    Because he’s out for blood tonight
    You know we gotta sit around at home
    And watch this thing begin
    But I bet there won’t be many left
    To see it really end
    ‘Cause the fire in the street
    Ain’t like the fire in my heart
    And in the eyes of all these people
    Don’t you know that this could start
    On any street in any town
    In any state if any clown
    Decides that now’s the time to fight
    For some ideal he thinks is right
    And if a million more agree
    There ain’t no great society
    As it applies to you and me
    Our country isn’t free
    And the law refuses to see
    If all that you can ever be
    Is just a lousy janitor
    Unless your uncle owns a store
    You know that five in every four
    WON’T amount TO nothin’ more
    THAN watch the rats go across the floor
    And make up songs about being poor
    Blow you harmonica son!

    …. 😯

    (copy&pastecopy&paste)

    😯

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  40. Nice to see shearer talking like a fan on motd – beauty man
    Well it’s in our own hands tho we do have some tough games coming up

    This is beyond belief, if someone had told me we would be in this position with 4 games to go I would have thought they were mental or just taking the **** …… Fucking dreamland

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  41. SteveP, av seen yee on tinternet before like, quality drumming. Me and yee could go a long way 😉

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  42. (Return to Forever, Chick corea, Al Dimeola, buy one get one free, Nelson mande..

    ..ah, ****, soz

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  43. Right bunch of boring cunts on here like

    …am ordering pizza, with free crispy next door neighbour’s cat paws, gorry get diskoont fothat like innit.

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