Forgive me for starting the obvious but what is JFK actually doing?

Transfer activity at NUFC
Transfer activity at NUFC
The 16th of June was your typical early summer Sunday. Wimbledon had yet to start, the weather was still hit and miss, and the only mention of Royal Baby was Luis Suarez spitting his dummy out over his apparent ‘treatment’ from the British press.

The transfer window wasn’t even officially open, and the memories of a painful season gone were starting to subside. Life, while not brilliant in the world of NUFC, was stable – that all changed with the yellow counter flashing across the screens of SkySports News…

BREAKING NEWS: Newcastle Utd, appoint Joe Kinnear as Director of Football.

Six weeks later and we’ve seen a British male winner at Wimbledon for the first time in 77 years, the longest and hottest heat wave for almost seven years and the arrival of Wills and Kate’s bundle of joy. In the world of NUFC we’ve heard some toe curling interviews, a new speciality on the menus of late night food outlets – the Yohan Kebab, Derek Lambezzee deciding he can’t take the heat of the kitchen and Alan Pardew going MIA for 25 days – the one thing we haven’t seen though during the whole of that time, a recognised signing.

Six weeks since JFK announced to the world that he is literally the greatest thing since sliced bread with a contact book putting the Yellow Pages to shame and we are still the only Premier League club yet to make a senior signing – not unless you count a 16 year old or a set of gates. It therefore begs the question, what has Joe been doing in the month and half seen he arrived?

We know that barely three weeks into the job he took a week off on hols – while I’d never begrudge someone a well-earned break I can’t help but feel the timing was not the best. I can’t imagine it sitting too well in the North Pole, if Santa took the middle two weeks in December off for a jolly with Mrs. Claus!

Putting that aside, the rumour mill has been in overdrive with plenty of names being linked – the likes of Bent, Gomis, Sinclair, Remy, De Jong and Gignac to name a few from a very long list.

As part of these rumours we’ve been given assurances from those supposedly in the know that progress is being made and negotiations are coming along, however, for the sceptics amongst us its getting a little alarming that the season is less than a month away and yet despite the whispers we seem absolutely no clearer to getting someone over the line.

Take Darren Bent for example. Not everyone’s first choice but considering the pool of options are getting smaller and smaller by the day beggars can’t be choosers. Bent’s name has been banded around for a fair few weeks now and even Pardew himself has said he is a player he’d very much like to have.

Now surely if that is the case, shouldn’t he of been wrapped up weeks ago? We are currently well into pre-season and now should be the time when new players are being blooded into teams, getting to know teammates and working on formations and tactics. Darren Bent has been outcast by Villa for months and is currently peddling around on an exercise bike someone with nowhere to go – surely if that is who we are after, he should be in Portugal now with the rest of the squad? More importantly, shouldn’t that be the job of Joe ‘black-book to footballing gods’ Kinnear to make that happen?

For all his guff and bravado, six weeks in and the results do not make for pretty reading – player recruitment currently sits at zero. Any other organisation or line of business, you might be at risk from ‘friendly’ chat from the boss telling you to buck up your ideas. As it’s Mr. Ashley he answers to I can’t imagine that’s going to happen. What I do know though is the season kicks off in just over three weeks and considering our goal shy options from last year currently sit at one who effectively and realistically will never play for us again, one who’s record is three in the last two years and probably should only be wheeled out when we play them down the road, and one who’s only just old enough to order a pint and has approximately 37 minutes of competitive first team football to his name, it really doesn’t make for pretty reading.

People are judged on results. Joe Kinnear needs to start justifying his position very quickly.

By SouthernGeordie

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399 thoughts on “Forgive me for starting the obvious but what is JFK actually doing?

  1. So now Cissegate is finished perhaps we could now get a signing in , preferably someone who can play alongside him and provide him with the chances he needs to score . Or is that just wishful thinking on my part 🙄


  2. ‘It’s just like a new signing!’ Pardew excalimed excitedly.

    ‘We were just about to get a deal over the line for Gomis, but to be honest I was always hopeful we’d sort the Cisse issue out. Mike Ashley has been brilliant this summer. I’ve lost no key players and now Cisse is staying we don’t need a striker.’ (Reporter looks confused?)

    …’So the lads can get on and look forward to the season without having the worry of Joe Kinnear bringing someone in to replace them. It’s a relief to be honest and will go no ends to improve morale knowing nobody is coming in. It makes for a tight, intimate squad. You can’t underestimate that.’


  3. Great stuff with Cisse staying. Likely that whatever has happened could have been sorted before the tour, but we never do things the easy way no do we.
    Two signings and I’m fairly happy.
    Squad only needs fine tuning, this season needs to be back to basics. Pardew needs to prove he can get the most out of some very talented players. The players themselves need to prove they are worth the money they are paid. Cabaye/Sissoko/Tiote with HBA in front of them can be the central midfield in the league.
    Right winger and striker, come on JFK. I promise never to slag you again if you do this. I’ll put a daft Troy disclaimer expressing my love for you and everything.


  4. Interesting slant on things in the Mag ;

    I have long since given up on Alan Pardew’s tenuous grip on reality.

    Since the arrival of Joe Kinnear as his boss you can hardky blame the man for feeling like he is losing the plot when he has that idiot looking over his shoulder.

    However, the pre-season has increasingly brought his ever more desperate comments to the fore.

    After Newcastle were soundly beaten 3-1 by Mickey Mouse Portuguese club Rio Ave who play in front of two thousand at their domestic league home matches, Pardew came out with comments such as Newcastle had bossed the game, by far the better team, plus I counted at least 8 players who the manager reckoned had had great games.

    The second and final game of the Portuguese pre-season was against Pacos de Ferreira and this is what Alan Pardew had to say afterwards;

    “That was a terrific performance to get a draw against a Champions League side who, let’s not forget, finished just behind Benfica last season.”

    Hmmm, well – it kind of depends on what you mean by ‘just behind’?

    This is how the top of the Portuguese League table looked at the end of the season just gone (points then goal difference);

    78 (+56) Porto
    77 (+57) Benfica
    54 (+13) Pacos De Ferreira

    Pacos de Ferreira did indeed finish only one place behind Benfica but a bit like in Scotland before Rangers self-imploded, outside of the top two is nowhere, as the 23 point gap behind Benfica shows.

    I don’t set great store by friendlies whether we win or lose but I don’t like our manager treating us like fools.

    As for the comment about it being great getting a draw against a ‘Champions League side’, there are ‘Champions League Sides’ and then there are ‘Champions League sides’.

    Pacos de Ferreira have NEVER played any Champions League match in their history and their upcoming Champions League qualifying tie will very likely be their first AND last.

    Apart from also only playing in front of a couple of thousand every home match (their capacity is only 5,000), the recent league finishes in a league of only 16 teams have been; 11th, 6th, 15th, 10th, 10th, 7th.

    To put into further perspective, Maritimo who were really really poor when we played them in the Europa League had qualified for that by finishing with 50 points two season ago. In the season just gone, Pacos got 4 more and ended up as a ‘Champions League side’.

    Trying to make out as though this was great opposition is crazy and doesn’t do Alan Pardew any favours.

    It is like saying Welsh side TNS or Irish club Cliftonville are ‘Champions League sides’.

    At least the manager stopped himself short of saying the Ameobis could be a top class forward line…didn’t he???


  5. Enjoyable read Troy.
    Still, I find it amazing hypocritical that people can slate Ameobi, and then ask Pardew to do better.
    What is a team without it’s strikers?
    Genuine question, not philosophical.
    If Ameobi bumbles over and noone is around to hear it, did he even fall at all?
    Also preseason means naff all. 6-1 to Lincoln.
    In terms of results I may actually want us to do badly to jolt the board into action.


  6. I was looking forward to buying the Cisse charity shirt. Oh well.


  7. I always though Cisse was a dodgy geezer, ever since he got the lip on with our top scorer Ba last season.


  8. [email protected], who is “the board” ? 😆 😆

    Cisse has lost a load of brownie points from me following this Wonga shirt episode.

    If knacker Ned thinks we can achieve anything this season with a single striker then he needs his heed looking at. The bloke really hasn’t learned anything from last season 👿


  9. Well I am hearing some really poor and worrying signals coming from people who should have some degree of knowledge of what is happening at NUFC.

    Will we sign anyone?? Will Cisse be like a new signing, or Gosling?

    All very shambolic and amateurish in my opinion.


  10. So the Cisse dispute seems to have been resolved. I wonder what it was all about.

    The good news just keeps coming.


  11. Vegas, hopefully we will find out the truth when Troy produces the actual quote from Cisse where he says he will not wear the wonga shirt for religious reasons 😛
    It will be interesting to see the real truth behind his refusal to travel and train with the team. To date we have basically relied on press speculation and no real quotes from the player or the club…


  12. Big [email protected], of course Cisse had brownie points from me mate, he had loads of them, in fact because of the Freiburg connection I was one of the first to post on here that I was ecstatic that we had signed him. 😉 easy to understand really 😉


  13. You’ve got to love Aussie & Begas. The entire world knows about the details of the Cisse / Wonga issue and unless they hear a direct quote from Cisse, then it’s all made up. 😛 😛

    For the sake of the blog. Perleaseeeese. 😆


  14. I remember someone saying “there was no way Cisse can back down from his stance against Wonga now” 😆 😆 ahh the mirth!
    Troy tell your mum that Newkie and I are sorry, we had a bit of a blog argument last night and we both know how much they can upset her! :mrgreen:


  15. I reckon we will see a swift move for Remy or Gomis now.. I think that there was more to the Cisse thing than that which was being let on.. I reckon he was close to being sold/leaving and the club were waiting to see what the outcome was.. watch this space, I have a Troy like feeling in my bones… :mrgreen:


  16. Munich-I remember you saying that actually @391. My feelings o him are pretty similar.

    Aussie 😆 😉


  17. @Aussie

    Perleeeeease find the quotes from Cisse that he was close to be sold / leaving. 😛

    The nerve 😯 the double standards 😯
    The hypocrisy 🙄

    I’m the only one who listens to you on here Aus. Don’t cut your only lifeline. 😛


  18. 😯 these are my opinion Troyster, I don’t state them as fact like some 😆 😆
    You can cut the lifeline if you like 😛


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