The ideal weekend?

toonsy

Think safety.
In the last article I looked at early team news for the Newcastle v Wolves match at the weekend. This is great in isolation, but it’s more than just that one result that needs to be taken into account.

Over the weekend I painstakingly and monotonously dragged up a list of all the fixtures for every team that is, in my opinion, involved in the relegation mix. From Sunderland in ninth right down to Wigan who currently occupy the bottom spot in the league, all of the fixtures and dates can be found in this handy little list detailing the Premier League run in.

So how about a week by week countdown with predictions and the like? Not a competition, in fact not even a prediction game so to speak, but instead it gives us a chance to look at the fixtures and work out what would be the perfect weekend for NUFC when you take into account the results from the entire league. You’ll see what I mean I think in a minute.

Below is a list of the weekend fixtures from the Premier League, and next to it is what would be the ideal result for Newcastle. What d’ya reckon?

West Ham v Man Utd – Man Utd win.
Birmingham v Bolton – Bolton win.
Everton v Aston Villa – Everton win.
Newcastle v Wolverhampton – Newcastle win.
Stoke v Chelsea – Chelsea win.
West Brom v Liverpool – Liverpool win.
Wigan v Tottenham – Tottenham win.
Arsenal v Blackburn – Arsenal win.
Fulham v Blackpool – Draw.
Man City v Sunderland – Man City win.

Now obviously that is the ideal world, but it would leave us in ninth place with a seven point gap between us and the relegation spaces. Not all of the results will go like that of course, and knowing Newcastle it will be us that will be the odd one out!

So what are your hopes for the games at the weekend? The fixtures actually look pretty favourable for us to be honest, but we must make sure that we do our bit and get the win against Wolves at all costs. We should be looking to keep our destiny in our own hands, and if we can do that it doesn’t actually matter what the rest do as it won’t be enough.

I’ll be doing one of these a week until we are safe, more to give everyone a heads up with what is against us at the weekend.

What’s your opinion?

About toonsy

A lifelong Newcastle fan and current webmaster of this very 'blog who has the sole aim of creating a place by Newcastle United fans, for Newcastle United fans.

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85 thoughts on “The ideal weekend?”

  1. I think it will be a tricky game and we will have to play well. Especially looking at our home form and the 3pm ‘curse’ I wouldn’t be suprised if we get a draw or lose even. In Jarvis and Hammil they have real creativity so their not just a team of cloggers.

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  2. Btw,

    Pardew is gonna be on bbc newcastle total sport programme this evening (5.30 – 7.00) answering questions from fans; or so it says on .com.

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  3. Just tried on my skinny jeans, Ugg boots, crop top and snood! Lookin gurd if I say so myself.
    Win on Saturday we are safe. Lose and we are gannin doon. Draw and we are neither up nor doon.
    Jean E Iss

    (whumpie – I know but I had just posted and this thread came up, I couldn’t be bothered to think of anymore rubbish).

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  4. BS9 are you real man ? do you not think it will be too warm for a snood.
    Toonsy I think your predictions look pretty realistic mate 😉

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  6. @big Div
    You don’t understand, this is a silk snood , not for warmth but pleasing to the eye.

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  9. Just goes to show that you can have all the ability in the world but it matters not one bit if you haven’t got the brain to use it. He’ll be playing somewhere shitty like a Greek team in a few years….

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  10. Nice approach Toonsy – puts a bit of structure around this run-in.

    Not sure that even two wins will be enough this season, mind. Weird, weird times.

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  11. As said on previous thread – I’m a bit more optimistic about this weekend. If they’ve used the time wisely the players should have some clue about their jobs on the pitch this time.

    My odd prediction: Guthrie MOTM.

    (Bk, Biased. I admit it. Family from Shrewsbury)

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  12. I agree with Dave, your predictions looks realistic and will probably happen 😀

    Also lets hope on Tuesday Jarvis and Gyan collide with each other and both are out for the season. Not that I’d wish an injury on another player 🙄

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  13. Balotelli – what a first-class fucknugget. If the story’s true.. and let’s face it, it’s not a big stretch of the imagination.

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  14. “And even if the 1% chance happens, and Newcastle (heaven forbid) are relegated, Blackburn and Birmingham get nowhere near 50,000 home gates that Newcastle do, and you wonder why on earth Danny would want to join either of those two clubs.”

    Yes Ed, because players are paid in fans aren’t they? 🙄

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  15. Maybe a cheeky punt for Balotelli in the summer. If this darts thing doesn’t do it, one more incident and City will sell him. Could we steal him like we did after City dumped Barton?

    Total delusion but he is the lunatic entertainer we have all wanted since Tino :mrgreen:

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  16. dan4toon
    Posted March 28, 2011 at 12:11 PM

    “Also lets hope on Tuesday Jarvis and Gyan collide with each other and both are out for the season. Not that I’d wish an injury on another player”

    😈 😈 😈

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  17. I think Scumberland will get utterly mooked by Citeh with or without Gyan and Jarvis. Hope so, anyway. 🙂

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  19. Funky – hate to say it, but I hope not. While I admire what Joey’s done this year, I’m going to make myself unpopular by saying: it hasn’t been worth it.

    Too many years of strife, cost and damage to the club’s reputation. The £5m would have been better put elsewhere. Let’s not go there again, eh.

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  20. They’d probably be best mates, to be honest.

    The line between genius and insanity is a thin one and they’d probably get on after kicking lumps out of each other because they are the top dog in training tricks.

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  21. Balotelli, Benny and Barton on the same pitch. They’d need an armed response unit in the first 10 minutes.

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  23. Add Insomnia to that as well toonsy 😉

    Ed finds the Simpson rumors absolutely hilarious… To be honest it’s not even that far fetched I don’t think 🙄

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  25. funky, a think he will go to AC Milan if he were to leave. I remember when he played for Inter he went on a talk show with a AC top!

    Imagine if of our players went on some talk show with a Sunderland top 😯

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  26. I am sure Tiote will keep them all in check, lol.

    His forehead is so large, he could headbutt them all in one go.

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  27. dan4toon
    Posted March 28, 2011 at 12:19 PM

    “Ed finds the Simpson rumors absolutely hilarious… To be honest it’s not even that far fetched I don’t think”

    Neither do I. I mean lets be fair, Simpson has done better than I expected, but he is hardly a key player and is easily replaceable IMO.

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  29. lol, yeah, I thought I recognised him.

    Tiote just looks hard as nails though. When he got his new contract, he looked like a giddy 9 year boy but you can just tell he eats nails for breakfast.

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  33. feel sorry for doyle in a way seemed a get the job done sort of guy,pleased hes not playing like,would have made our back four graft thats for sure

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  35. icedog
    Posted March 28, 2011 at 12:38 PM

    “feel sorry for doyle in a way seemed a get the job done sort of guy,pleased hes not playing like,would have made our back four graft thats for sure”

    Exactly. The lad grafts and never gives defenders an easy time. That Hunt is the same.

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  36. Got about 10 toonsy 😆

    And well I did pick Doyle as one of my 5 to buy this summer 😉

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  37. Doyle scores one goal every 10 games though. People complain about our strikers now – why get another who can’t score?

    Would be as well playing Ranger.

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  38. i think you ng fergie can handle hunt like,think wolves may shift him more inside for this one as our m/f havent got his pace but we will see

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  40. It may well be that the survival of Newcastle will come down to how well Leon Best’s ankle holds together. I believe that I’ve read 3 or 4 different times during the pre and rgular season that he has had injections in his injured ankle. Just what was administered has not been disclosed.
    While Best is not the kind of striker that carries the ball, or uses his deft touch to get goals, he does have the ability to be where he is supposed to be and take his chances to good effect. Let’s hope he has 8 good games left in the ankle.

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  41. funky, yeah but how much support does he get, I mean they don’t play anyone off him and just expect him to run the channels, come deep and score goals with out any support and he still has 8 goals this season.

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  42. funkyjesus
    Posted March 28, 2011 at 12:45 PM

    “Doyle scores one goal every 10 games though. People complain about our strikers now – why get another who can’t score?”

    Because at least Doyle brings an extra dimension, such as work ethic and defending from the front to the team. You also have to bear in mind that Wolves don’t create many chances (nearly bottom of chances created league) so naturally his options are going to be limited.

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  43. FJ,doyle is good player would have him in a flash at toon,his lack of goals is due a lot to the way wolves play him,he is very good at pulling defenders out of pos right across the back line,scored well at his last club mind playing a diff way

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  49. Lovenkrands was free. Doyle will be about £7m plus. He doesn’t offer what the fee would require.

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  50. funkyjesus
    Posted March 28, 2011 at 12:54 PM

    “I’d prefer we got Sylvan Ebanks-Blake. That’s a PL goal machine”

    The fecker always seems to do alright against us 👿

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  51. funkyjesus
    Posted March 28, 2011 at 12:56 PM

    “Lovenkrands was free”

    Conclusive proof that you get what you pay for generally.

    Fee = Nothing
    Lovenkrands PL contribution = Nothing

    😛

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  52. Lovenkrands also helped get us promoted. Doyle has the potential to get Reading and Wolves relegated because he is such a shocking attempt at a striker.

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  53. blake normally comes on late in games,after doyle has run the **** out of defenders,its wolves way,and it works well for them from time to time

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  54. Doyle has a strike rate of 1 in 3 PL games. Lovenkrands has a striike rate of 1 in 6, and is older.

    The promotion argument doesn’t wash with me. Alan Smith and Nicky **** helped us get promoted as well FFS.

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  55. Plus Lovenkrands is practically a sweaty. Perhaps he should hop over the wall and **** off back there.

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  58. Aye, he should be starting because he helped us last season, and Fitz Hall, and Marlon Harewood 🙄

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  61. Ice, he’s at Barnsley on loan I think.

    Also who can forget Zurab and his ‘performance’ vs Scunthorpe away 🙄

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  62. I see Neil Lennon is in the **** again? Why doesn’t he learn? Sore loser. What a fanny, moaning about everything. Fergie Mk II

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  65. He objected to the ref pulling a machete on him during a friendly with Athletic Bilbao or whoever it was.

    That’s what I made up anyway. Lennon is a ginger Balotelli :mrgreen:

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  75. Ice – He just never learns and it annoys me. It will hurt Celtic in the long run as they will get singled out by ref’s IMO. Lennon will moan more, the SFA will be on it and he will get banned more etc etc..

    He just needs to engage his brain rather than ranting like a pissed up idiot all the time!

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