The top-three #NUFC Twitter tw@terers!

toonsy

Tweet tweet
Ahh Twitter….. I still sometimes wonder what the point of it is, but it can’t be ignored as it’s serious stuff these days and reaches millions of people at the touch of a button.

That’s an awful lot of potential reach at the end of your fingertips!

Celebrities use it to keep in touch with us mere mortals without having to actually get dirty and meet us in person. News channels break news instantly while businesses reach out to consumers offering them deals and engaging with customers. Even footballers have started using it more and more, some wisely, some not so wisely. There are a few people who seem to milk it though. It’s like a drug to them and they get high off the attention. They are the Twitter Twatterers of NUFC.

You know what I’m on about right? They are the people who claim to have inside knowledge of transfer dealings and general goings on at Newcastle. They are wrong, and have been proven to be wrong the vast majority of the time, but people still listen to them. Here are my top three.

@toonmania1892 – Personally I’ve not seen this one on action although it was recommended for my 5hit-list by a few people. Toonmania is currently adamant that we are about to witness a flurry of transfer activity at Newcastle United that includes Jose Enrique staying at St James’ Park. I’ll not be rushing to the bookies just yet…

@ChrisyYatesITV – Emmanuel Adebayor and Gael Clichy were seriously under consideration by Newcastle, and Charles N’Zogbia entered contract talks with us back on June 18th according to this ITV correspondent. ITV have since confirmed that he does not actually correspond for them at all. Funny that eh? Listen to him at your peril as he talks absolute ****. He now claims that his account has been hacked for months and that only his newest tweets are his own.

And saving the “best” until last. The man who started it all off for me….

@cwarr07 – Recently been made to look like an arsehole by Joey Barton, and then by numerous other people, the man behind the moniker is prone to making some bold claims. To his credit he got one or two right, but he has got so many more wrong that it looks as though he fluked the ones he called right. I’ll probably be blocked for daring to go against him as that seems the standard practice if he doesn’t like the heat, but for me he is the #1 Twitter **** when it comes to NUFC.

Now cover your eyes and ears if you don;t like swearing, but here is the disclaimer: DO NOT FOLLOW ANY OF THESE AS THEY ARE FULL OF *****!

If you want to follow some gossip, because we all love a bit of gossip now and then, then take a peek at @MsiDouglas as he knows more about what is going on than any of them and doesn’t make outlandish claims that he can’t back up. Of course, don’t forget to follow us here at @nufcblogcouk if you aren’t already doing so.

As for the top three, treat them like a firework – hold them at arms length!

About toonsy

A lifelong Newcastle fan and current webmaster of this very 'blog who has the sole aim of creating a place by Newcastle United fans, for Newcastle United fans.

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56 thoughts on “The top-three #NUFC Twitter tw@terers!”

  1. that cwarr says he was out on the lash with kenny shepeard and his lass,shepeards lass came on and called him a lier 😆 😆

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  2. No different to me trying to wind up everyone on here when I first started a couple of years ago.

    It’s amazing how many take it in. I did it solely to wind the gullible up as I was exasperated to read all the superstar players some believed we would get.

    Hands up.

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  3. i saw dat an he called it ‘twtter bander’ and claimed he has a lunch date with them 2nite haha what a nob end

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  4. cwarr07 Colin
    Time to head to Beamish & a great Sunday lunch at #Shepherd&Shepherdess later
    2 hours ago

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  5. TOONSY well done mate its about time somebody has shown them to be very lonley wum,that have in no way any love of the toon,well done sir

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  6. HAHA twitter is crazy , think a large pinch of salt needs to be taken with twitter , I love reading the rumor but i wouldnt take any of it as fact on it

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  7. Don’t even think Mark Douglas knows anything, but to his credit, he seems to suck less nonsense out of his thumbs…
    I’m not even sure our managers know too much about transfers, incoming or outgoing… 😆

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  8. I won’t believe anything I read on tw@tter, and personally think managers should ban their players from using it to comment on football, with hefty fines in place for any ‘illegal’ tw@ttering.

    Joey Barton repeatedly puts his foot in his gob, and that little mercenary sh1tehawk from Chester infuriated a whole nation of Geordies with his crass and inaccurate spouts recently.

    Footballers get paid to kick a ball, not write (OK, apart from the odd columnist). they should keep their thoughts to the training ground and friends, and not publicise every random thought on a whim.

    …as for the pratts named in this article, let them spew their chunks if it makes them feel good – they obviously have some sort of inferiority complex or attention deficit disorder.

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  10. Its a shame when dickheads post a load of ***** (worse than mackems). We get enough lies and bullshit from the club. Everything I read on these forums I take with a pinch of salt. Only nufc.com posts anything of substance and honesty

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  13. I can’t even remember what my personal twitter account is. I see no point in the average person having one. I’m not sure people are that interested in what I’m up to to be fair.

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  14. @batty

    Aye, wor Donna had some craic like. 😆

    I can’t believe you you fell for her hook, line and Batty that you asked her out for a date . 😆 😆 😆

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  15. I love twitter, I’m on it more than facebook now. Don’t like cwarr always gets things wrong and half of the time I’m sure he makes things up just to get people excited about what is going on at Newcastle

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  16. A little off topic i know guys, but i couldnt help but wonder what happened to all the rumours about that guy Barnetta, did anything ever develop? Also, any news on any transfers, i ve been outta the country for a couple of weeks and wanna get caught up on the gossip. While i was away i had been thinking about defensive additions, does anyone reckon that Laim Ridgewell of Birmingham could do a good job for us. I watched him play last season a few times, thought he was more than decent!!!

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  17. Batty, speaking of bull5hitters, whatever happened to Troy Stavers? Does he still pop in to spout his cybersh1te? ……oh, and ‘David Craig’, he was a proper tw@t too.

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  18. bobby fook off ya daft c@nt 😆 😆 little ryan toon thought he was a physco murderer when me and stardy had finished with him 😆

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  20. hahaha RyanToon and the ‘Toon Trio’

    …..who could forget ‘BennyToon’ and ‘TomToon’

    >>>|>>>|…..

    🙂 😀

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  23. So Troy is Bobby Shinton eh? He seems far too sensible to be capable of Mr Stavers’ rants! 😮

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  25. Deane -Apparently we will sign Barnetta if we lose Barton… probably not true though… hence Toonsy’s article…

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  26. rod aye troy bobby shinton stavers ,he will tell you himself ,he is 1 crazy fooker his facebook is just as daft ,but iam jealous as fook as he had his pic taken with king kev last week 👿

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  27. Remember Tom Toon from Eds.

    He rated every Russian player in the world and then he disappeared of the face of the earth.
    Progbrenyak – world beater.
    I think.he must have been the demo tester for FM back then…

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  29. batty
    July 10, 2011 at 15:05

    “i am jealous as fook as he had his pic taken with king kev last week”

    Thanks to Jill and me 😉 😛

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  30. hahaha JJ, yeah he used to argue and disagree with everyone just for the sake of it. Probli loads of people on here from Ed’s under different names. Don’t see the point of changing usernames mesel, unless you get banned of course!

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  33. rod i once posted under every 1s nick who was on 1 night used proxy ,then ed changed it too log in 😆

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  35. Bats, aye, I think you must’ve blagged me once too! I never worked out who it was but it wound me up sumik rotten!

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  36. Anyone ever heard of ZeTom, from the old BBC 606 forum?

    Guy used to list players from Zimbabwe with their player stats from FM and say they were twice as good as Andrei Arshavin (before Arshavin signed for Arsenal).

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  37. hahaha, nah FJ, I only used to bother with Ed’s. There was sh1tloads of that FM regurgitating though.

    ….mind you, probli just as accurate as youtube for judging a player’s abilities – maybe even more accurate!

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  38. Rodzilla, I think we are talking about the same guy.

    A guy called Tom who spammed forums with FM influenced suggestions. Seems more than a coincidence.

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  39. ….could well be, FJ. TomToon used to completely litter threads with punctuation marks in comment boxes too, no words. Fkn annoyed the life out of me. I’d write a meaningful, concise and quite lengthy post, then get a…

    …|…

    ….or something in the next comment box. He claimed do do it so he could find which comments he’d read up to – so I just used to do it back to him all the time as revenge. The crazy world of blogging eh…

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  44. Zoe he blocks anyone who says anything bad about him or questions him when he’s wrong…

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  47. Haha, your probably right. Although I don’t reply to any of his tweets so I probs won’t get banned 😆

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  49. Whever actually believes these knobs deserve to be dissapointed and made a fool of.

    Their saddo’s with no jobs or mates and this is the only way they get attention.

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  50. Few of the top of my head..

    He said when we played Birmingham at home it’ll be good to see Larrson considering he’s already agreed to join in the summer.

    N’Zogbia is done deal first through the door.

    Gervinho is done deal lets celebrate.

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  51. Andrew- yeah I remember those ones, so far he hasn’t got those right at all

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  52. lol good old tom toon i think he was dennis wise,
    Stu i can agree with you a bit but there is lots of the younger ones fall for it just through being young and naive to some extent.

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  53. Tw@tter is the worst and crapiest invention of the 21st century………………. but I wish to **** I’d thought of it 😆

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  54. What happened to craig coozy, someone said he got collared by nufc for posting details – think he changed his username but havent seen anything from him recently

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  55. going to set up my own twitter account call it Rsoles we will sign God the secret seven, Thomas the tank engine,Nzogbia ,Pele, George Best and Bobby Moore all crowd pleaser’s. Ashley and Lambrusco will get the No bull prize for services to Lying. Only one of these comments could be possibly true you have to guess.

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  56. you see the twitter tw@ts latest …… he is tellin every 1 our game v Arsenal and Sunderland are televised … thats not the tw@t part .. this is the Broadcast fixtures wont be announced till 2moro lunch time haha.. as much as i love watching the Toon id love if neither were televised just to rumble the knob further !!! He is taking a pure guess although it likely he is right

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