Pardew the text pest!

Pardew on the charm offensive?
It seems as though an olive branch of peace will be extended early next week, with the aim of hopefully clearing up the Joey Barton saga once and for all.

I was just reading the Sunday Sun and found it amusing that Alan Pardew is planning on texting Joey Barton next week. I don’t know why it tickled me, it just did. Perhaps Pardew can try his hand at Tweeting to put a rather ironic and amusing twist to what is hopefully going to be the end of the story?

There is nothing new to report on the situation with Joey at the moment. He is still exiled with the development squad and all parties are taking “time out” to reflect on things. With Arsenal now less than a week away a sense of closure is desperately needed on yet another pre-season distraction.

“Joey’s situation is where we were on Friday. We’re all taking a deep breath and seeing where we go,” Pardew told the Sunday Sun.

“You want to have your best players and I’m a manager who wants my best players playing for the club.”

“Joey needs to buy into what we’re doing – if he doesn’t see that then he’ll probably go. But you never know – we’re all taking some time out. We’ll assess it next week.”

“Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday me and Joey will have a couple of texts and we’ll take it from there.”

One question: why not just speak to him? It’s a novel idea but it may just work. Mind you, I sometimes text the Mrs when she is in the same room as it’s just easier, and she doesn’t have a violent past to consider either! I jest of course…

This pre-season has brought about more questions when in reality we wanted answers to some already outstanding questions. The Joey Barton situation needs resolving, as does the Jose Enrique situation, as does the situation with the squad. With little time left it looks as though all of those situations will roll over into the new season.

I’m not one to keep hold of players who aren’t overly interested in playing for us in truth, and that includes Barton and Enrique. My view is that you can never really give 100% to something that you aren’t fully behind, which is wrong when we’re talking about footballers who earn millions of pounds a year to do just that, but hey it’s the world we live in.

I’d love Barton to stay but, as Pardew says, he needs to be on board or else we’ll just see more sly digs and veiled comments on Twitter which will end up further upsetting the dressing room and causing more unrest within the ranks at St James’ Park.

Time will tell of course so we’ll just have to wait and see whether or not it can be resolved. I do wonder what that first text would be though?

Hi Joey. I rly wnt u 2 stay. TB pls <3 Al.

About toonsy

A lifelong Newcastle fan and current webmaster of this very 'blog who has the sole aim of creating a place by Newcastle United fans, for Newcastle United fans.

68 thoughts on “Pardew the text pest!

  1. Toonsy
    You text the Mrs when she’s in the same room?
    Ever thought of being a communications officer with a football club?

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  2. Joey’s becoming more and more surplus to requirements.

    I think he’ll be lucky to make the bench if he stays.

    Our midfield is so strong, will Pardew risk another moral-sapping episode by bringing Joey into the team?

    I think Joey’s blown it.

    btw I’m a big Barton fan …

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  3. how can pardew say he doesnt want to keep players that dont wana stay?? barton has been quite the opposite , he wants to stay and the club to invest the money we havent seen , plus pardew kind of contradicts himself, as he is beggin erding everyweek to play for us and the man does not want to!!!!

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  4. Same geoff. I like barton, think he’s a top player but he’s a CM not a winger. And if we have tiote/ben arfa cm and pardew reckons cabayes the best thing since sliced bread he’s probably not going to start there. He’s alright as a winger but nowt special. Need a proper RW in. Looks like obertan is the man pegged for that role. Not too sure about that one but we’ll see…

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  5. i dont think bartons comments would unsettle a dressing room that is already unsettled and devoid of any characters, nolan , carrol and enrique etc have have either left or are leaving because of similar opinion to j b but they said it after they leave, at least joey wants to stay and adress”s it here!!!

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  6. jonas played well, harris and bully aswell on saturday. i like the look of cabaye but we were seriously lacking up front, they had a hard job with the weather like. tim krul did excellent job in the net

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  7. i dont believe a word coming from pardew anymore, he is just ashleys puppet after all, strings and everything, muppet and puppet

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  8. Regarding Erdinc and also Gameiro for that matter, we have had since January to jack up our striker so surely they have had ample time to sound out the players via agents as to the price, wages and more importantly, if they want to come to the club and yet here we are with 3 weeks to go and we are no further forward.
    I read what Pardew said about that we cant compete with the top clubs in the transfer market, we all knew that and he is saying they cant meet our expectations, what a load of *****.
    Is it so wrong for us to want better than Ameobi, Best and Lovenkrands? No one is expecting Rooney or similar, but a decent forward wouldnt do any harm and they have had ample time to buy one yet are still scratching around, what worries me is that they signed Kuqi so they are not afraid to to buy bargain basement if need be.

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  9. txts,whats this man on,ive backed pardew,but this is a joke he should be speaking to joey face 2 face..

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  10. its people like joey that need to look up from midfield and see a focal striker of some stature and ability to deliver the ball to, it must be down heartening to work for the ball and try to create something knowing it would prob go to waste giving it to shola or someone! WE NEED 2 YES 2 QUALITY STRIKERS IN MY EYES MR PARDEW

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  11. What is particularly annoying about this ongoing Barton thing is that the entire nation south of Gateshead think this is hilarious and that we are now reaping what we sowed by being so forgiving in the first place.

    Why are we not hearing of this kind of **** coming from other clubs?

    Personally I’d be a lot more impressed if Barton stopped scouring the net for quotations and thought up something himself.

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  12. We need to keep Joey. There will be many games we will go with five in midfield and Joey is the best passer of the ball we have.
    A midfield three of Barton Cabbaye and Tiote would rival any other mid table side. Benny ahead if that three in a free role.

    The mystery of this transfer window for me is what lies or spin was given to Cabbaye to make him come here. he must be having doubts when used to champions league football he hears his manger saying even europa league is beyond our means

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  13. Biddy – perhaps you could clarify what you mean by “Targeted for disposal”?
    We got 35 million for Carroll after turning down a couplle of already outrageous offers. He wasn’t encouraged to go until the offer hit the point where it was stupid not to acccept.
    Nolan left because he couldn’t get the contract he wanted, either the cash or the duration. Hardly “targeted” seeing as he still had 2 years left.
    Barton has been, well, theres no other way to put it, a knob. Temper tantrums and tweeting dissent. What else did he expect would happen?
    Enrique wants out for better salary and Euro football.
    How did they target him? Deliberately failed to qualify for Europe maybe?

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  14. lol what a joke Pards is. I’m going to text him Mon, tues, or Wednesday? why tell a reporter that, and yes why not pull him to one side and speak to him after training? you are on the same field ffs.

    Perhaps it takes Joey to “buy into the bullshit” a little longer than the rest of us gullible fools, coz I can see the direction we’re heading & I’m not totally convinced either.

    Wheres this forward we were promised and more importantly why has Tiote’s passport been left until the begining of the season to sort out?

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  15. Maybe its not Pardews decision on whether he stays or not, therefore a text will give him something to take to the other muppets.

    Mark, what direction should a newly promoted side be heading in?

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  16. Robert….The problem we have is that it probably doesn’t make a blind bit of difference when we start talking to strikers or their agents, they will always wait and see if bigger, better offers come in from bigger, better clubs,hence why alot of deals get done right up to the deadline, so we only usually get to sign the players that don’t get the better offers.That’s why I have a little smile when people say don’t sign him if he doesn’t want to come, Newcastle United are not the first choice for any players, only the likes of Man Utd and Chelski etc have that honour, the rest of us have to fight over the scraps imo…unfortunately.

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  17. One thing is for sure, you cannot accuse Pardew of keeping schtum with the press. The bloke is aaal ower the place every day….it’s just that neebody gives him any credit and he is often ridiculed, sometimes rightly so, sometimes unfairly. However, at least he doesn’t hide…

    Before that we had gentleman Chris who was an absolute expert at saying nowt…

    What do you all prefer like ?… 🙄 🙄

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  18. Hitman….Last I heard they’d sent Derek Wright out there to keep him fit…..bearing in mind DW is even fatter than me it’ll be interesting to see how that works out 😆

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  19. There are some real big name strikers out there who will be in danger of playing pocket billiards on the bench when the season kicks off next week. Welbeck, Sturridge, Adebayor, Bellamy…..wonder where these blokes are gonna end up on loan ? There again they may just sit tight and take the wedge, we have a couple of those types at the toon…

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  20. Munich….Aye, I’m starting on mesel today with a fitness prog, put loads on in UK, whoever telt me lager and kebabs are good for you were telling me porkies methinks 😆

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  21. Chris who was an absolute expert at saying nowt…
    What do you all prefer like ?… I’d easily prefer CH, he didnt talk ****…

    @JIGGAJOE
    Mark, what direction should a newly promoted side be heading in?

    perhaps the right direction would be a start. We’ve had ample time to sort out a striker, we havent… we had £35mill to spend and take us to the next level, but bought freebies. (some decent but its a gamble) Pre-season was a bit of a stinker and tiote is still stuck in Africa. We may still lose our ‘player of the season’ and imo we have weak defence, whick could be weakened again once JE leaves.

    My biggest concern is a striker, plenty out there so why wait? whe have a masive network of scouts scouring Europe and will leave no stone unturned..apparently

    More likely C Cole is ironing out his payoff from the hammers b4 signing for us.. 😥

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  22. I agree it has been typical newcastle this pre-season, I am still hoping that we are waiting for the right people to become available.

    Last day of the transfer window we have always been vulnerable, there havent been too many moves so far, hopefully we are better placed now to take advantage.

    Lots of hopefully there, but there is enough time to make it a successful window. Plus we have to spend now as all the freebies have been taken 🙂

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  23. The Tiote visa thing has nothing to do with Pardieu.
    That falls fair and square on the shoulders of the MD feckin Lambs ****.
    Ashley should be ripping his nuts off for such incompetance. The bloke is a complete and utter waste of space. 👿

    I’m sure pardews txt will be simply to let him know time and place of ‘chat’

    Thought we were on the back foot quite a lot yesterday, and but for Krul’s excellent saves could and should have been 3 down by half time.
    The defence looks poor, shockingly poor considering they all know each other.
    Best looked no better than he did in the championship. We need a goal scorer desperatly ffs 👿

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  24. Have we missed out on any strikers that we should’ve bought?

    I remember when Ba went to the Hammers ppl saying we should’ve bought him, luckily we got him for free.

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  25. RICHIE aye your aboot ashleys weight now dave telt me.
    reading between the lines pardew seems fed up with the hole show,in fact he seems really down and who can blame him just hope its not feeding into the players,in that interview about orberton on ssn it looked a shock to him,maybe owl-heed forgot to tell him 😕

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  26. BSn9 was right – god that pains me to say that- but we could have got Gameiro when we first targetted him, but instead of offering him an impossible to turn down contract/wage, we insulted him by trying to get him on the cheap. This may well work for other positions in the squad, but wont when it comes down to a striker.
    Its simple, you want goals, you gotta pay for them. End of.

    It worries me greatly that we will wait till the last minute and then panic buy some expensive load of **** has been mercenary, that doesn’t really want to be here.
    Grrrr 👿 👿 👿

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  27. “It worries me greatly that we will wait till the last minute and then panic buy some expensive load of **** has been mercenary, that doesn’t really want to be here”………..or Ashley will tell Pards to “make do” with what he has 😥

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  28. MM I believe part of the managers job is to speak to the fans and try to keep them in the loop, for me Pards does come across as if he likes to talk, but Hooters never spoke to us and kept us in the dark like mushrooms just the sameway the board do.

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  29. Hitman…you obviously don’t grasp how expensive undersoil heating is these days, not to mention the associated gas bills 😉 😆

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  30. ————————krul

    simpson—-s.taylor———-collo——–enrique

    ———————tiote
    ———gosling————-cabaye
    marvo or obertan———————————–jonas
    ———————-ba or new striker

    i think that will be our line up next week like!! looks very strong

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  31. aye he should talk to the fans,just a pity he doesnt tell the truth,he cannot as he doest kna himself or would be out on his ear fed up with the whole show me-sel,just hope the lads can show us something to cheer us on

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  32. Apparently free transfers are the most expensive transfers you can get 🙄

    On a plus note……2 in next week and another one before the window shuts…….probably 8 out though :mrgreen:

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  33. Richietoon@39…they could connect the pipes to Pardews gob, there’s loads of hot air coming oot from there…..

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  34. Big Dave…Pardew talks to much, and he’s obviously out of the loop….Chrissy H just stonewalled all the tricky questions….

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  35. He comes out with a load of **** at times but there aren’t many managers who don’t, Fergie..”Ronaldo’s going nowhere”, Harry….”Modric going nowhere”, ya sure ‘Arry?….Keegan, “Milner’s going nowhere”…then it was “we’ve got a good price, wait til the new players come in with the cash we have”(sound familiar?)……..they all get mugged over by the boards and get made to look stupid.What’s true now won’t be true in 10 minutes That’s football, it’s always been that way and always will be like that so I don’t know why it bothers people so much now. I take everything Pards says with a pinch of salt,then I don’t get upset, it’s the only way 😉

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  36. Here is my list of most unpopular toon managers of all time…..re-arrange them as you like….

    Gordon Lee, Joe Kinnear, Graham Souness, Kenny Dalglish, Ruud Gullit.

    Does anyone really believe Alan Pardew should appear there ? Is he in cohoots with Ashley or is he also being shafted from the board ? I wonder sometimes like…

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  37. Richie…all the managers talk the talk…thats the nature of football, fickle and money talks. The crazy money being spent by 10 of europes top clubs spoil it for the rest, cos ultimately the fans get the lip on cos they all want to be seen as top clubs…the toon included. Now we are LIGHT YEARS away from our last Champions League venture. Once upon a time it was possible to push on into the top 4, now there is so much money being hoyed aroond you can forget about it…

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  38. MM as I said the Manager should talk to us as he is the only person that can keep us in the loop. Pards does seem as if he talks too much but I do believe he is only doing the interviews and answering the questions put to him. All we ever got out of Hooters was’ this group of Lads’ . I wonder how if he feels the same about his current group of lads 😆

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  39. Richie…I watch highlights to all the Bundesliga matches on a Saturday night at 18:00….Have been to see FC Bayern a couple of times, but not too often. FC Augsburg who are 1 hour from wor hoose just got promoted to the 1st Bundesliga, I might have a skeg up there some time…

    The team to watch this year is Borussia Dortmund, they are really hot, play fast football, have an average age of 25 and run like flock every game. They have a totally radged manager Jürgen Klopp who gets his team playing the same way. Well impressed with them.

    FC Bayern will also dee alright like…as always..

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  40. Big Dave….I feel sorry for Pardew sometimes, cos he’s squeezed in the middle between the fat controller and the players. There again he’s well payed for doing his job, and managing volatile characters is part of his job. There again if some players are radged and uncontrollable somethings gotta give.

    The bloke seems affable enough, just hope he can get the team performing and the constant whinging may desist.

    I’m REALLY curious as to how the fat controller will react if the toon are in the brown stuff come Crimbo….

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  41. Surely the I’ll text Barton thing was just a bit of a joke, tongue and cheek to fit in with all the twitter carry on

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  42. Simon I know he was joking about twitter aswell so who knows. I just sometimes wonder why with some fans Hooters could do nowt wrong and is still the almighty one, but Pards can do nowt right 😕 same as Tugboat could do nowt wrong and was as loyal as they come but he jumped the 1st chance he got.

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  43. Dave….it’s all about fitting in with views imo, ignore the good focus on the bad or vice versa depending on your stance 😉

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  44. Munich..I used to watch Werder Bremen a bit when I was based in Hohne, one of the German civvies used to drive and me and a Celtic fan used to go and get wasted and watch the match with him.

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  45. Big Dave….although I think Hoots did a wonderful job for the toon, and that will never be forgotten, I often think that Pardew get’s a hard time when he’s trying to do his best. I mean of course he’s one of Ashleys appointments, and because of the hatred for the board he will always be in the firing line, but sometimes he must be thinking “what the flock is going on here”…. 🙄 🙄

    Pardew will go the same way as Gullit, Souness, Allardyce et al……i.e. he’ll be toast….. the toon fans have become notorious in recent years I’m afraid… I seem to recall Hooters was also welcomed with open arms by the toon fans when he slid into KK’s hot seat…

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  46. Richietoon…I remember you telling me once you got a Jaarman umpah band to play Blaydon Races once ower. Since that day you’ve been a legend in my eyes mate…

    Hercules…..are they a poor mans Spenymoor ? What league are they in mate ?
    In Spain they play late Saturday night I believe, excellent time for a game imo….

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  47. Dave, I do feel sorry for him at times, think he gets a lot of bad press for no reason at all. Of what I know about him (dont know him myself, just from people who are friendly with him) he’s a great bloke, a very nice person. Think he gets too much stick. Most of the stuff going on is not his fault, all coming from his bosses, so not a lot he can do about it.

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  48. Werder Bremen used to be canny but they’ve been a bit naff for a couple of years now, ever since they sold Diego. Mertesaker probably off to Arsenal before the end of August, then they’ll spend this season fighting against relegation….

    Big Sam was on my list mate…though I forgot Big Jack… 😳

    Wonder if Cashley has got a french manager lined up to replace Pardew…probably the only one daft enough to touch the toon job… 👿

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  49. Yeah I think the penny has finally dropped and Pardew realises he is just the 1st team coach/ashley mouthpiece when req’d.
    I dont think he will be able to stomache it for 5 yrs and will be gone as soon as he has repaid his debts 😯
    I’m sure he’s not happy being the fall guy for the two fools all the time.
    Its a shame as I kinda like the guy, and he seems to have an idea of how to play football and what we want to see on the park. But it cant be easy with one hand tied behind your back and lambs arses hand up ya jacksie.

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  50. BB…..I reckon the fans will realise the truth once Pardew has gone. He’s trying his best at the minute….

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  51. MM…..Hercules are segunda liga, they got relegated last season unfortunately.Barca B team is the same league so I’ll be able to do some scouting for freebies 😆

    Munich….the “Blaydon Races” was in Bavaria on adventure training 😀

    ….are you sure you have big sam there? 😉 …..reet off oot for a bit, laters.

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  52. ” you obviously don’t grasp how expensive undersoil heating is these days, not to mention the associated gas bills”.

    We had our undersoil heating installed by Spinal Tap, its better than normak undersoil heating cos it goes all the way up to eleven.

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